My mom used to wear slim gold necklaces. People whispered to my dad at his office Christmas parties, that surely, being a doctor, he could afford to buy some nice jewelry for her. So he did, more than once. But she never liked it. For years and years my dad wore a shoddy leather coat …
Category Archives: Parenting
Sad Story
The last two times I’ve left Rebecca with someone outside our extended family, she’s gotten so anxious she’s puked. The first time was in August, and I was perplexed and not sure what had happened. The second time was in October, right after she turned two, and I felt like a failure as a mother. …
Dirty Hippies
One morning at 6 AM, I tell Rebecca that she doesn’t have enough cat hair on her lollipop yet, and that I won’t wash it off (again) until she does. She’s not eating the lollipop, as far as I can tell, just using it to pick up cat hair. Rebecca loves the drama of messes …
A Little Knowledge
If, like me, you’re the sort who likes to claim status based on what you know, then motherhood presents a problem. What good is it to know that all last week Rebecca said “aku” when she meant “ice cream,” and that her jelly sandals are more comfortable with socks on, while her brown shoes are …
Boundaries Are A Bad Idea
Don’t tell me that toddlers need boundaries. Boundaries are a bad metaphor, especially where young toddlers are concerned, because most things counted as boundaries would be better conceived as positive expectations. Take for example, “No naked in the front yard.” This kind of prohibition gives the child freedom to put on clothes and be outside, …
Unmaking Mistakes
My mom used to ask what mistakes she’d made as a parent. When I was in my mid-twenties, I thought her biggest mistake was not insisting that I drive a car regularly in highschool. I’d taken drivers ed at 17 and got my license based on a written test, but I didn’t really learn how …
Mom in Black
When I was 19, Ted and some Skiffy friends dressed up as Men in Black for a movie premier. I dressed up enough to avoid looking out of place next to them, but when it came down to it, I was not a MIB. How did I fit into the group then? Ted decided that …
First Words (Just Like Magic, Part Two)
Given how standard it is to ask about a baby’s first word, it’s ridiculously complicated to figure out. One time when she was a couple weeks old, Rebecca was sleeping in my lap when I heard a very small voice, very clearly say “Help!” I looked around the room, half expecting a fairy or gnome, …